a monday pick me up contains adult humour

[mountainman]

 

[Whyme]

A couple of naked lesbians barged into the house today, and started wrestling with my mrs while she was in the bath. I tried to help,
but I could only knock one out.

 

[Whyme]

My mum bet me £100 I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti.

You should have seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!

 

[SimonG]

I've just started a new job as a comedian in an old peoples home.

They don't understand the jokes, but they still pi$$ themselves.

 

[SimonG]

I shoved some purple grapes up my girlfriends a$$ during kinky sex last night, she didn't scream or anything.......just let out a little wine.

 

[SimonG]

I got sacked from my job as a bingo caller last night, apparently "A meal for two with a hairy view" is an unacceptable way to describe the number 69.

 

[spanner]

Lolz thatched amazing

 

[galaxy_plumbing]

[video=youtube;W714sCvy2EM]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W714sCvy2EM[/video]

lol.

 

[lame plumber]

the funniest part of the vid is his haircut!

 

[turnpin]

My mate pulled at the weekend he said she was a 1664 ?...he explained she looked like 16 from behind and 64 from the front ..after a lot of drink she dragged him back to hers and led him to the bedroom ..he said the room was full of shelves with all types of teddy's and doll's sitting on them ...after a night of passion she woke him with a cup of tea ...he said how was it for you last night ...she replied he could choose anything from the bottom shelf.....lol regards Turnpinunk:

 

[CES]

 

[Dotty]

I went up to my wife holding a gun and said, "Any last words?"


Two hours later, I killed her

 

[kay-jay]

 

[Dotty]

New regulation in South Africa.

 

[julesverne]

if being attacked by a bunch of pyschpathic clowns to protect yourself always go for the juggler