Do you wash your hands before or after weeing?

[Masood]

If you wash them afterm you're a w***er apparently!

How To Spot a Masturbator ? Stop Masturbation Now

I'm not sure whether that's a spoof site or for real, but it's very very odd...

 

[Phil]

What the hell were you searching for to find that!

 

[Dotty]

My grandad used to tell me "Son, there's two types of people in this life. Liars and Whankers. Choose your corner."

I'm not a liar, I know that much. ...

 

[Masood]

What the hell were you searching for to find that!

Mate, stuff like that pops up on my facebook feed. I have weird mates...

Looking further, it is a satirical site so it's really not a surprise that it's on my feed given the kind of pages I subscribe to!

 

[Dotty]

Mate, stuff like that pops up on my facebook feed. I have weird mates...

............... Hang on a minute!

 

[Masood]

............... Hang on a minute!

Didn't say I don't like it! I'd rather weird than normal any day!

 

[turnpin]

Always before ....that Everflux is a killer...lol regards Turnpin:rofl:

 

[townfanjon]

Before and after lol ....... Worrys me when I go to football and we que for a slash at half time , I kid you not 80 % walk out without washing there hands , and I normally sneak in to the ladies .

 

[SimonG]

Before if I've been chopping chillies

 

[Masood]

Before and after lol ....... Worrys me when I go to football and we que for a slash at half time , I kid you not 80 % walk out without washing there hands , and I normally sneak in to the ladies .

Stopped at motorway services last night on my way home, had a slash, was washing my hands. A bloke came in, had a slash, walked over to the basins and without washing his hands, straightened up his hair and walked out! Dirty, dirty bastid!

 

[townfanjon]

Stopped at motorway services last night on my way home, had a slash, was washing my hands. A bloke came in, had a slash, walked over to the basins and without washing his hands, straightened up his hair and walked out! Dirty, dirty bastid!

My point exactly, lol

 

[Phil]

I won't touch toilet door handles I either have to use my sleeve or pretend to dry my hands for ages until someone opens the door and I scurry out.

 

[mfgs]

I won't touch toilet door handles I either have to use my sleeve or pretend to dry my hands for ages until someone opens the door and I scurry out.

I am the same. Every toilet door should be pull to get in, push to get out. Pointless washing your hands if you have a grab a handle that every person that didn't wash their hands uses! You just end up with hands dirtier than when you went in.

 

[Stigster]

Personally I wash my meat in the morning and surely it's good for the day as long as you don't wazz on your hands?

Tip for those who don't like to touch the handle on a pull to leave scenario - If the door has a closer, reach up and push the hinged bar toward the door and the door will open a bit so you can get your foot in to open it the rest of the way.

 

[Rickster123]

I wash my hands at the same time. Multitasker me.

 

[Phil]

Personally I wash my meat in the morning and surely it's good for the day as long as you don't wazz on your hands?

Tip for those who don't like to touch the handle on a pull to leave scenario - If the door has a closer, reach up and push the hinged bar toward the door and the door will open a bit so you can get your foot in to open it the rest of the way.

Until someone flings the door open and it cuts your fingers off! ha ha ha

 

[Phil]

I was at the doctors getting myself looked at and he said "you're really going to have to stop masturbating, you do realise that?"

I said why??

He said,,"because I can't examine you properly!!"

 

[Rickster123]

I was at the doctors getting myself looked at and he said "you're really going to have to stop masturbating, you do realise that?"

I said why??

He said,,"because I can't examine you properly!!"

I'm storing that one for home made Christmas cracker jokes!

 

[oz-plumber]

As Plumbers, I'm sure it is hygienically better to wash our hands before we go to the toilet, than after we go to the toilet.

As Plumbers, I'm sure we have a greater immune system then the lay person.

 

[newcastle phill]

When I'm home I get the Mrs to hold it for me.

If I'm out I wait til I get home [emoji6]

 

[Stigster]

I've just remembered another one. I was doing an oil boiler install, new tank, lines the lot. The customer was one of those who wanted to shadow my every move and following me everywhere I went and it was driving me crazy. I have a policy of not asking to use a customer's toilet and only doing so if it was an emergency dump scenario or they offer use of it first. This customer hadn't said, "use the bog if you need to" so I was bursting for a slash and keep a Lucozade bottle in the van for the purpose (they have a wider neck than most bottles) the only real danger being mixing up my Lucozade bottles when I'm driving ;-/

I go out to the van, open the best strategic door to hide myself a bit and start refilling my bottle. Ten seconds into my wee wee the custard comes over to my van, sees what I'm doing and quickly walks away again pretending he hadn't seen me. He stopped following around after that thankfully.