Agony Uncle

[Whyme]

Dear Tamz. Should i own up to being responsible for all the Hall of shame installs ?

 

[Dannypipe]

I knew it!

 

[Kyle87]

Dear Tamz,

I just left my missus. Hardest thing I've ever had to do as I leave my own child behind who I would die for. But if I stayed with a woman I do not love then I would find myself in time straying and hurting her much more than leaving her now. Also my little girl would resent me for her life if I cheated on her mother. So it's best I left now.

The only advice/help I need now is.....how the hell do I soothe the ache where I've just ripped my own heart out of my chest by leaving my daughter. It's been about 3 hours and already I miss her terribly

Kyle 🙁

 

[tamz]

Dear Tamz. Should i own up to being responsible for all the Hall of shame installs ?

Never admit to anything. Always blame the boy or that numpty who was with you :smile:

 

[gasmanrob]

Jeez this just got deep

 

[tamz]

Dear Tamz,

I just left my missus. Hardest thing I've ever had to do as I leave my own child behind who I would die for. But if I stayed with a woman I do not love then I would find myself in time straying and hurting her much more than leaving her now. Also my little girl would resent me for her life if I cheated on her mother. So it's best I left now.

The only advice/help I need now is.....how the hell do I soothe the ache where I've just ripped my own heart out of my chest by leaving my daughter. It's been about 3 hours and already I miss her terribly

Kyle 🙁

Kyle i'm not the best one to offer advice on this except don't do what i did which was if there was a wrong way to handle the x wife, i did it.

 

[tamz]

Jeez this just got deep

Aint it just!

 

[Ermintrude]

Chin up Kyle. You will always be her daddy! Just don't you forget it.

 

[Whyme]

dear tamz me again.
after looking long and hard in the mirror today, i realized one of my ears is lower than the other. What should i do.?

 

[gasmanrob]

dear tamz me again.
after looking long and hard in the mirror today, i realized one of my ears is lower than the other. What should i do.?

Walk around with your todger out to draw attention away from your ears

 

[Whyme]

Walk around with your todger out to draw attention away from your ears

good call. as long as my knacker cant be seen cos there in sync with my ears.

 

[Whyme]

knackers (bloody no edit button)

 

[gasmanrob]

Mine are the same one of mine hangs lower then the other two

 

[tamz]

Walk around with your todger out to draw attention away from your ears

Spot on :smile:

 

[sheff paul]

As a man of the world i'll offer advice on anything.
Test me :smile:

Tamz's as a man of the world,could you offer me some advice on 'excessive masturbation',my missus says it's good for the prostrate,and it's natural,but it is getting in the way of daily tasks like walking the dog,shopping,cutting the grass,and recently I have been caught doing it in the fresh fruit aisle in Asda,can you take 'me in hand' and offer some guidance.....

 

[Ermintrude]

I tried avoidance therapy. Coated my Palms with sandpaper........... Now I can't get off without that firm grip an 80 grit offers!

 

[sheff paul]

I tried avoidance therapy. Coated my Palms with sandpaper........... Now I can't get off without that firm grip an 80 grit offers!

sounds a bit like my last treatment for 'genital warts'

 

[lame plumber]

I tried avoidance therapy. Coated my Palms with sandpaper........... Now I can't get off without that firm grip an 80 grit offers!

wear out yer willy doing that!

 

[Ermintrude]

Nope, the lesions and infection mean it's about 13 inches in circumference and when it weeps no need for lube. Smells a bit tho. Balls are septic?

 

[Dannypipe]

Tamz's as a man of the world,could you offer me some advice on 'excessive masturbation',my missus says it's good for the prostrate,and it's natural,but it is getting in the way of daily tasks like cutting the grass.....

Struttergear ****mower - YouTube

Filthy but funny!

 

[kay-jay]

Mine are the same one of mine hangs lower then the other two

I think thats normal......at least I hope it is!!😱

 

[Ermintrude]

Brilliant

Saw this one the blokes a genius
http://youtu.be/ugd0UcP3Deo

 

[Whyme]

if a customer doesnt make you a cup of tea is it wrong to cut there gas off..?

 

[tamz]

Sounds ok to me. Pysh on their tooth brush too if you like :smile: