Dealing with elderly customers

cr0ft · May 13, 2012

Hi all.

So here's the situation. An elderly customer needed a new bathroom installation and I got the impression that whilst she could hold a decent conversation that she didn't understand the details of the project fully. She said she had no friends or family locally. She had called me because her old shower was leaking so badly that water had come right through a woodchip filled stud wall. I informed her that I wouldn't offer a fixed price on the work until I had stripped it out and seen the extent of the damage. She said she was happy to go ahead with this work.

On stripping out the bathroom I found the usual signs of extensive water damage. She had fitted cabinets etc too and given that the worktop was rotten and the cabinets were all filled with black mould I asked her if she wanted these removed and replaced too). She had actually cleared them out that morning and was expecting them all to be removed.

So I stripped the room prior to a de-humidifier being installed to dry the room out. At this point I gave her a fixed price quote for the repair work and suggested she may want to obtain some other quotes too (I'm always paranoid about anyone thinking I'm taking advantage of elderly people). No, no, I'm fine she says, I will go with you as I know you now and have seen your work.

After a further visit to help her choose materials I placed a quote with my local supplier. I gave her estimates for all of this which were spot on it turns out.

On Saturday I get a call from a 'concerned friend' who, apart from being quite rude, clearly has no idea of the decisions her friend has made. She all but accused me of ripping out the cabinets and skipping them without permission. On top of that she says she cannot understand me as I have a strange accent (must be a Lincolnshire thing, even though I have a Scottish accent she is the first person who has trouble understanding me). Even if the customer didn't they should say so to be honest.

I offer to meet her 'concerned friend' and the customer to discuss any concerns she may have prior to continuing.

Email this morning, sorry I've decided to go somewhere else.

A relief to be honest as I don't want to work on a project where I'm not trusted. I've built up excellent customer feedback over the last few years and I don't want to risk that.

Have any of you had a similar situation? How do you deal with it? More than anything I'm really hacked off with her concerned friend who has jumped to conclusions without knowing any of the facts to be honest.

Starting to get really fed up of this game since I've moved tbh!

SimonG · May 13, 2012

It happens, if you were ripping them off you wouldn't be bothered enough to post on here. I am the same, it gets your back up a bit, it annoys you as you don't feel trusted but to be honest I think you are well out of it.

I went to a broken 3 port valve a few years back, all the pipework was tight and it was about 6" from the ancient cylinder and the cylinder was leaking from the connection. I explained I wouldn't touch the valve as I believed it would do away with the cylinder. No problem, change the cylinder as well. Turned up a few days later with valve and cylinder, all the gear in the house and then told a 'friend' said nothing wrong with cylinder. I looked at the bloke and simply said that his friend better fix it then, put all the gear in the van and the bloke was following me wanting me to do the work, just simply said no but it bothered me for a while. I did the right thing though. imho

mountainman · May 13, 2012

It's really difficult dealing with vulnerable people, shame this concerned friend didn't materialise while you were stripping out.
With hindsight I suppose you could have taken piccies as work progressed (I do that for absent owners).

Another success for Rogue Traders and Mel & Dim!

cr0ft · May 13, 2012

SimonG said:
It happens, if you were ripping them off you wouldn't be bothered enough to post on here. I am the same, it gets your back up a bit, it annoys you as you don't feel trusted but to be honest I think you are well out of it.

I went to a broken 3 port valve a few years back, all the pipework was tight and it was about 6" from the ancient cylinder and the cylinder was leaking from the connection. I explained I wouldn't touch the valve as I believed it would do away with the cylinder. No problem, change the cylinder as well. Turned up a few days later with valve and cylinder, all the gear in the house and then told a 'friend' said nothing wrong with cylinder. I looked at the bloke and simply said that his friend better fix it then, put all the gear in the van and the bloke was following me wanting me to do the work, just simply said no but it bothered me for a while. I did the right thing though. imho

Put's it in perspective though. I hope you were able to return the cylinder or re-use it soon enough.

I know I am deffinitely better off out of this job. If the customer can't remember decisions they have made then that doesn't bode well for being paid at the end of the job!

Guest123 · May 13, 2012

You couldn't have been any more open in my opinion. Concerned friend is one of these know it all numpties and the fact that she says that she couldn't understand your Scottish accent is bloody racist as she is obviously having predefined ideas of how Scottish people behave, while never actually meeting one. Probably watched that trashy show on TV, The Scheme and think we're all like that, when the reality is we're far from behaving like that show. She needs a reality check that one.

You tried all you could and got a lucky escape. Court action would probably have happened somewhere along the line, plus payment being with held.

SimonG · May 13, 2012

cr0ft said:
Put's it in perspective though. I hope you were able to return the cylinder or re-use it soon enough.

I know I am deffinitely better off out of this job. If the customer can't remember decisions they have made then that doesn't bode well for being paid at the end of the job!

Aye, it was used soon enough.

secret squirrel · May 13, 2012

You've done nothing wrong here.

Vunerable people are difficult sometimes. Its not them though, its always the friends and families. When a tradesman or nurse or anyone who tries to help steps in the family surrounding them feel that they should have acted and got involved.

They didn't want to know when there was a problem but when action is taken then they get involved to make themselves feel less impotent.

My friend works in a care home, an old dear took a fall as she was getting out of bed and the family accused the care home of neglect, abuse etc etc etc.

The member of the family only visits once a month! How do they know/understand/care about the type of care the elderly patient is receiving but they feel they need to step up. Too little too late.

Howsie · May 13, 2012

I now take pictures for this very reason.

Leo21 · May 13, 2012

Wouldn't mind betting that nearly all off us on here have had a similar experience, where a badly informed friend or relative get involved. And it is really unsettling. Recently I had an elderly lady who couldn't work her heating system, what can you do?

cr0ft · May 14, 2012

Thanks guys. Good to hear I'm not the only one. The main reason I got p***ed off more than anything is that I'm definitely not a cowboy trader but that is basically what the friend was implying.

Never mind, life goes on 🙂