Awkward moments at work

[oz-plumber]

Years ago, I had a customer who had a boob job done.

She opened the door, I walked in an she asked whether I noticed anything different about her.

( I did notice ) but said " You've changed your hair style"

She lifted her top and asked me if I had noticed 'these'

End of Story

 

[rpm]

Both mother and daughter knew I was in the house, fused spur was in a bedroom so when job was completed I walked into the bedroom to find 13yr in bra and panties, she freaked out but mum was as good as gold and calmed her down saying it was the same as wearing a bikini.
Thank you mum!

 

[rpm]

Mum let me in the house and told me daughter was asleep upstairs after working a nightshift, she didn`t tell me daughter was very fit, slept topless and had habit of leaving her boobs on display through half open door!

(Very hot summer)

 

[rpm]

Father let me in the house and told me son was upstairs asleep, hang on think I`ll put this one on the sparkies forum ! :lol:

 

[Stigster]

I went to change a leaking valve on an unvented cylinder a few years ago. I knock on the door of this bungalow and hear a muffled "It's open mate!" so in I go. I announce my arrival properly and say I'm going to need to turn the mains off to change the leaking valve on the cylinder. "Down here mate!" came the reply so I walked towards the door I can hear the voice coming from and find it slightly ajar and realising it's the bathroom I'm hesitant but he says "In here, come in mate!"

I opened the door and there was the customer. A bloke in his late 60's, sat on the toilet, trousers down taking a dump. To add to this bizarre scene he was puffing away on a cigarette and connected to an oxygen system for his emphysema. I backed out immediately and said, "where's the stopcock?"

"It's here mate, a bit stiff so you'll have to turn it" - It was between the toilet he was sitting on and the wall and he expected me to bend down next to him, taking a carp, and turn it off myself!

I said I wasn't going to carry on talking to him whilst he was giving birth to finless brown trout and would come back in 5 mins. After that everything went fairly well.

 

[Phil]

Ha ha ha...imagine if you did reach for the stoptap and he said..."while yer down there mate"

 

[Stigster]

The hideous thought did cross my mind. I figured he didn't have long left because he was on **** and oxygen at the same time (and that's without an explosion) and he might go for one last try at a bit of fun.

 

[hammers4spanner]

Come across many odd situations over the years working in peoples homes ,mostly social housing contracts seems to be many odd folk in these types of homes. Been kicked out of a house because a hooker had business, walked in on a chinese guy giving himself a quick knuckle shuffle ,had a few tranvestites open the front door when i have arrived .
The one that makes me chortle tho is when i was passed an apprentice was told he was lazy but needed a hand with someone to hang some rads , halfway through the morning cust comes up and says can i have a word with the apprentice . I ask why whats the matter ? well he's in my bed fast asleep she says . Go in the bedroom and their he is giving it full on ZZZZZZ's.

Could of died at the time .

 

[hammers4spanner]

One of the engineers walked into a bedroom to vent a rad last week and there was matey watching **** with headphones on knocking one out!! Awkward!!

Some of these H/A's are like a shrine to **** pictures used for wallpaper .

 

[1Steven]

I could fill a few chapters of a book!

 

[quality]

I once went to repair a faulty shower a while ago and as we walked upstairs together she was explaining there was no heat on any setting as we got to the top of the stairs, she turned and said "we have tried in different positions"

 

[Phil]

The mother of a customer was offering round the quality streets and she kept saying she loved a big purple one, I couldn't help but smirk.

Also in the tile shop a woman and her husband were in there complaining about a tiler they had recommended and she said she picks up on stuff as shes really anal, at least three times she confirmed loudly in the shop she was anal.

 

[Rickster123]

The mother of a customer was offering round the quality streets and she kept saying she loved a big purple one, I couldn't help but smirk.

Also in the tile shop a woman and her husband were in there complaining about a tiler they had recommended and she said she picks up on stuff as shes really anal, at least three times she confirmed loudly in the shop she was anal.

I'm glad I'm not the only childish one here! I had an old bird answer her door a while ago and she greeted me with the words "morning ****!" I nearly soiled myself laughing!

 

[Dotty]

Come across many odd situations over the years working in peoples homes ,mostly social housing contracts seems to be many odd folk in these types of homes. Been kicked out of a house because a hooker had business, walked in on a chinese guy giving himself a quick knuckle shuffle ,had a few tranvestites open the front door when i have arrived .
The one that makes me chortle tho is when i was passed an apprentice was told he was lazy but needed a hand with someone to hang some rads , halfway through the morning cust comes up and says can i have a word with the apprentice . I ask why whats the matter ? well he's in my bed fast asleep she says . Go in the bedroom and their he is giving it full on ZZZZZZ's.

Could of died at the time .

He would've been walking home there and then if he was my apprentice.

Told one apprentice to feck off home because he was no use to me (I'd been gritting my teeth for about two weeks up to this point!)

If it weren't for the fact we were in Enniskillen, 70 miles from where he lived and the public transport wasn't so shyte over here I would've let him go. And then told the management why.

 

[rpm]

I'm glad I'm not the only childish one here! I had an old bird answer her door a while ago and she greeted me with the words "morning ****!" I nearly soiled myself laughing!

Another missed opening?

 

[Rickster123]

Another missed opening?

Even with my low standards and lack of worry about personal hygiene it would've been a push!

 

[rpm]

Even with my low standards and lack of worry about personal hygiene it would've been a push!

Just lie back and think of KK as you normally do.

 

[Rickster123]

Just lie back and think of KK as you normally do.

Nothing wrong with her hygiene!! I bet she smells like a summers meadow!

 

[hammers4spanner]

Nothing wrong with her hygiene!! I bet she smells like a summers meadow!

More likely grandma's allotment

 

[Rickster123]

More likely grandma's allotment

I bet it's kept tidier than that!